When people think about getting married, they inevitably focus on things such as love, shared values and common interests. To be sure, these are important ingredients for a happy marriage, but more often the issue with your potential spouse is not what you know, but what you don’t know. The following are a few red flags to look for.
You Haven’t Been Dating that Long
Your partner is talking about marriage, but you have only been dating for a short while. This alone is not necessarily a red flag, but the truth is that the most important factor in two people getting to know each other is time. Perhaps once you get to know each other better you will realize that you aren’t right for each other and thus avoid a failed marriage. But if your partner is trying to rush you or push to get married that is a red flag.
Your Potential Spouse Doesn’t Like Talking About the Past
Many people don’t like to talk about their past if they have had bad experiences, but you should still know about them. If he or she refuses to talk about a certain period of time in their life, that is a red flag. Again, there could be a good reason for it, such as a past bad relationship, a hard childhood or abuse, or other traumatic event. Nonetheless you should still know about it before you decide on marriage. If they absolutely refuse to talk about their past, chances are they are trying to hide something.
You Have Never Met His Family
It is possible for a person not to have parents living or even siblings, but for most people they are likely to have at least some relatives they talk about or see. Even if they live out of state or in another country you should at least know about them. If you and your partner are serious about marriage you should have spoken to one or more of them on the phone, or at the very least communicated by email or text messaging. If you haven’t met any of her family nor communicated with them, this is a big red flag.
You Have Never Met Any of His Friends
People come and go in a person’s life, and it is possible that your potential spouse has few, if any, good friends, but there should be people that they are acquainted with, even if it’s just coworkers. If your fiancé has no one like this, it could be a red flag. What is even more serious is if they have a friend they see regularly, but simply avoid having you come in contact with. This is a serious red flag and can mean a variety of things.
The solution to any red flags you notice in your potential spouse is to run a personal background check for marriage. This is a service our private investigation firm offers, and it is highly recommended. We can do a deep background check for criminal records, name changes, aliases and other important things, so you will know exactly who you are marrying. In addition, we can do this with her not knowing about it.